


Holding On

by magentacartherwrites



Category: Star Wars Episode VIII: The Last Jedi, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Angst, Character Death, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Force Bond (Star Wars), Hurt/Comfort, Rating May Change, Reylo - Freeform, Sexual Tension, Slow Burn, Unresolved Romantic Tension, Unresolved Sexual Tension
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-01-09
Updated: 2018-01-09
Packaged: 2019-03-02 17:26:44
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,376
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13322979
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/magentacartherwrites/pseuds/magentacartherwrites
Summary: It has been seven months since Rey last saw Ben Solo on Crait.  Despite his best efforts to contact her, Rey has kept Ben out of her mind as she and the remaining Resistance fighters go into hiding on the city planet of Coruscant.





	Holding On

Rey stood under the pulsing stream of shower water, savoring every drop that touched her sun-kissed skin.  How long she had been there, she had no idea.  She didn’t care!  If she really wanted to, she could’ve stay under the hot water for hours, letting it run down her face and bare body.  Washing her of undesirable things.  

The feeling was comforting to her.  The heat of the scalding water reminded her of home… of Jakku.  She knew she would never return there, but it crossed her mind from time to time.  How could it not?  She had lived there all her life… it was all she really had to call home!  

Cleanliness was never a priority or concern of Rey’s when she was on her own.  The dirtier she was, the more protected she was from the blistering desert sun and the predatory junkers she’d often come across in her scavenging days.  A worrying lack of water was a huge factor as well.  Rey would never waste something as precious as water on something as trivial as her personal hygiene.

Now, she didn’t have to worry about conserving water or food to stay alive, and for that she was eternally grateful!

Rey regretfully finished her shower and wrapped herself in a sliver, silken bathrobe before departing for her room.  

Clinging tightly to her robe, the girl made her way silently down the dimly lit hallway of the base.  It was late, and all the remaining resistance fighters had long since fallen asleep.  Rey envied their ability to sleep so soundly.  Between the freezing cold Jakku nights, her hunger, and the never ending pluge of nightmares, it was a miracle that Rey ever got any sleep at all!  

A strange sensation of uneasiness crept over the girl as she approached her sleeping quarters.  A feeling of being watched.  Followed.  

Rey took a final glance down the dark corridor she had trekked through before she opened the door to enter her room.  The hallway was dark, silent, and empty, just as it was supposed to be.

Rey shook her head.  

 _You’re just tired_ ,  she thought to herself as she turned the doorknob and entered the room.

Rey should’ve screamed at the sight of the dark, cloaked figure of Ben Solo standing in the middle of her quarters waiting for her, but she didn’t.  Instead she sighed and closed the door behind her, not wanting to disturb any of the others down the hall.  

“Is this a bad time?”  Ben asked softly, taking notice of the girl’s apparent annoyance of him being there.  

Rey folded her arms against her silken clad chest in a disproving fashion, “Yes, it is actually!”  Her words had had that venomous bite to them that always managed to make Ben flinch.  “I have been working to keep you out of my head for months, and the second I get comfortable and let me guard down, you slip right back in!”

“Must’ve been exhausting for you… trying to keep me out.”  

“It was!  No thanks to you and your constant attempts to contact me!”

Ben lips curled into what was almost a smile, “I knew you would give eventually!  I just had to keep working at it.”   

The girl grit her teeth in annoyance, “You are so frustratingly persistent, Ben!”

“I am!”

Rey could feel the heat rising in her core.  Only Ben could make her come so close to losing it!  

_Don’t let him get to you!_

“Well, congratulations!  You broke through and made contact with me.  Now, are you just gonna continue bragging about it, or was there an actual reason for your visit?”

The knight straightened himself, his scarred face suddenly serious.  He took a step towards her, and in the pale light of the room Rey could see his new, regal attire.  He truly looked like royalty.  

“I just wanted to let you know that my offer still stands, Rey!  I don’t want to do this… not without you by my side!”   

 “Why would think I’d go with you after all you’ve done, Ben?  I gave you a way out!  I wanted to help you, and yet you _still_ chose the wrong side!”  

The truth of Rey’s words hurt.  He clenched his jaw, refusing to let her know the effect they had on him.  Ben once again stepped closer to the girl, not breaking eye contact with her.

“I didn’t want to be the Supreme Leader.  I wanted to burn this godforsaken regime to the ground.  I wanted to start over… with _you_!”  The emphasis Ben put on the last word pierced through Rey and sent a chill down her spine.  “And I know that you wanted that too, even if in smallest measure!”  

It was Rey who moved this time.  The girl stormed angrily towards the knight, who stood tall and unwavering, but afraid.  

“I _never_ wanted that, Ben!  I wanted to bring you back, not rule by your side!”

The knights eyebrows knit as he tilted his head to examined the girl.

“Why are you lying to me?” He asked with impossible gentleness, his dark eyes baring down into hers, “I don’t lie to you… I never have!  There’s no point!  I can see inside your mind, just as you can with mine.  I know your every thought, your every hope, your every fear-...”

“You don’t know anything about me,” Rey spat, knowing full well it was a lie.

“Stop, Rey!  Just stop it!  I know you better than you know yourself!”

With those words, the girl seemed to shrink in the shadow of the man towering over her.

“There is no point in trying to deny it, Rey…,” Ben proclaimed slowly advancing on the girl, “You wanted to join me then, and you still want to now!”  

Rey suddenly cried out in anguish.  Ben stopped dead in his tracks at the girls wail.  Rey’s hands flew to cover her face as she dropped to her knees before the knight.

“ _GET OUT OF MY HEAD!  LEAVE ME ALONE!_ ”

There was silence.  

Through misty eyes, Rey peeked out from behind her fingers to find Ben Solo gone.  

She was alone.  

Hot tears began to stream down her face.

“REY?!”  A sudden, worried voice called from outside of her room.  When she did not respond, a symphony of loud _CLANGS_ echoed through her room until the door was busted off its hinges.  A startled and disheveled Poe entered her quarters followed by a half asleep Finn.

“Rey, are you okay?  We heard shouting!”  Poe said as he knelt down to the floor with her.  

“I’m sorry...  I’m sorry….”    

Finn removed the blanket he was bundled up in and handed it to Poe, who wrapped it around the shaking girl.  

“You’re okay, Rey!  We’re here… We’re here,” Poe reassured as he pulled the girl in for a hug, “What happened, honey?  Why were you screaming?”    

Rey clung to the pilot as she tried to regain herself, “I… I was having a nightmare!  It just seemed so real!  I’m so sorry!  I didn't mean to wake you two!”

Finn kneeled down and ran a hand through the girls damp hair, “Don’t worry about us, Rey!  Is there anything we can get you?  Do you need a medical droid?”

Rey wiped away the tears dripping from her chin, “No, thank you.  I just… I need to try and get back to sleep!”

Finn and Poe were not convinced by her answer, but they didn’t try to push it.  

The men lifted Rey to her feet.  As they walked her to her bed, Finn couldn’t help but notice that it was made and completely untouched.  

After tucking Rey in, Poe gently squeezed the girl’s hand, “Finn and I are just a few doors down if you need anything, okay?  Just shout if you need us!”

“I will,”  Rey promised with the best impersonation of a smile she could muster.  Poe smiled in return.  

“Sleep well, Rey,” Finn said as he trailed behind Poe through the busted open door way, “We’ll… get this fixed in the morning!”  

“Okay.  Goodnight, Finn!”

The resistance fighter smiled and nodded a final time before disappearing back down the hallway.   

For the second time that night, Rey was left alone.


End file.
